Advocacy
On September 11th, 2018, I heard the four words that changed my life forever: “Your husband passed away.” Collapsing in the threshold of TRC’s front door less than 2 weeks after opening, it was in that moment, that I woke up.
I saw, heard, and felt both everything and nothing at the same time. Words fail me when trying to describe that experience. Layers of accumulated theory about life, love, and purpose were stripped away without my control, leaving me raw and exposed to nothing but the harsh truth that Danny’s life here had ended.
In that truth, a storm of unanswered questions, unimaginable confusion, and grave disappointment began to swirl from within this raw and exposed space. Not only did Danny fall victim to the disease of addiction and mental illness, he fell victim to the system. Looking in my children’s eyes, unable to fathom how to even hold space for the rupturing of our family, left me speechless and lost.
I will never forget that first night after he died – lying next to my daughter, watching her sleep. Suddenly, she took a deep breath and reached her arms up to the sky. She held them there for a few long moments, smiled, then fell back to sleep. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen anything so inexpressibly powerful.
Julie Funkhouser at a roundtable event to kick-off National Recovery Month, hosted by The First Lady and the Director of the Office of National Drug Control Policy at The White House, September 2020.
Julie Funkhouser and Meredith Speir lobbying in support of SB 903, 'Danny's Law,' prior to a vote in the Virginia General Assembly, February 2019.
I woke up again. The current of intuition kept pulling me. I had no idea what it would look like, but I knew he left behind this story for reasons beyond full human comprehension. I felt soul-bare, where all I could do was to speak it out loud – to family, to friends, to whoever would listen. Before I could fully land my feet on the ground, I found myself standing in front of the Virginia state legislature speaking out loud, but not just to others… FOR others.
Danny’s favorite song was “Ripple” by The Grateful Dead. I must say, after holding in my hands pages and pages of names who lost their lives to addiction as I lobbied alongside others for what is now known as Danny’s Law, I woke up again. I became more and more aware of his transcendent ripples of impact. If you’re never listened to the song, I encourage you to – crank it up and feel the depth of those lyrics.
From what I’ve been able to gather so far, his tragic departure from this life and the story he left behind were the catalysts for impactful momentum – a wave of hope to those battling addiction, an invitation to the empathetic tie among loved ones who grieve, a contribution to the shift in humanity’s perspective away from stigma, a widening of real energetic connection for my children on their life journeys, and the cornerstone of my own spiritual transformation. (Not to mention an ignited passion in advocating for change in our state and our nation’s behavioral healthcare system). I am certain that this is only a minute glimpse of Danny’s impact.
Although I fall short in my humanness all the time, get stuck in the quicksand of work / life balance, spiral in “mom-guilt”, whip out old thought patterns…at the end of the day, this is what I return to: I want to manifest miracles, illuminate the spirit of others through love and truth, and live life alive. Life happens for me…not to me. When I remind myself of these things, my heart center reopens to breathe in the light. Thank you, Danny, helping me wake up to the beauty of the journey. And for showing us, just as you showed our daughter that first night you left here, that those we love are not gone… just simply within arms’ reach.
Love and Light,
Julie Funkhouser
Areas of Interest
Crisis Intervention – hospitals, ER’s, community-based programs
Re-Entry Reform
Barrier Crimes Reform
Access to Care
Harm Reduction